Much like the literary genre “tragicomedy”, my life has been a fascinating spectacle of suburban angst, sprinkled with just enough laughs to get by.

I regularly find myself relating to other tragic figures, like Gollum (aka Smeagol) who I recently learned beat the shit out of his best friend, Deagol. All for a ring. Something I would do. We are alike, not only in our affinity for gold jewelry, but also in our dual natures (I talk to myself).

When talking to other people, I am often asked to craft the perfect text for a variety of situations. My specialities include the breakup text, the work excuse, the belated birthday wish, and the subtle (or not so subtle) flirt.

However, I would prefer to take my creative writing skills to the next level. That’s where you, dear reader, come in. If you think we'd work well together or if you’re in the market for a break up, please get in touch. Til then…